Tuesday, August 7, 2012

A Bathing Suit Story - and yes it's a retirement story

I don't love to shop for bathing suits.  I just try to find one that covers what needs to be covered, is comfortable when I swim and paddle board, and doesn't embarrass my family or me too much.  So today I made a quick run to the department store in the afternoon to try to replace my very old swimsuit that was starting to get a little threadbare.  I felt very lucky to be able to shop in the middle of the day when the stores weren't so crowded.

Of all things, there was a woman with her "retired husband" shopping near me.  He was the most annoying shopper.  Instead of waiting patiently in a chair while his poor wife tried to find something, he was actively involved in the selection.  They were both more advanced in age than me, and I could tell that the wife didn't like shopping for bathing suits any better than I did.  So there was her annoying husband pointing out suits (very ugly ones at that) and then when she showed him one, he would remark in a very loud voice - "Is it big enough?"

To make matters worse, he started talking to other women shoppers nearby.  I hid behind a rack of bathing suits so I didn't have to deal with him. He told them how he was helping his wife find a bathing suit, and he wanted to be sure she got one that was big enough!  Another woman began laughing and almost flirting with him, and his poor wife just kept plodding through the racks.

Later I found a bathing suit that met my criteria and was hurrying to pay for mine and get out of there.  Sure enough, there he was at the checkout presumably to oversee her payment skills and telling anyone who would listen how he helped her.   MiVida has never wanted to go bathing suit shopping with me, and I think I love him even more for that.  I just hope when she got home, she make him very unhappy for a long period of time.  And that brings me to

Retirement rule #1


Hopefully, I won't have to shop for one for another 7 - 10 years.  

1 comment:

  1. That scenario made me cringe but I also giggled to think of you hiding to avoid him! xoxxoxox